Date: |
 |
From: |
|
Message: |
6/2/05 |
|
ZePPa |
|
They can break my bones-
They can break my heart-
But nobody will ever break my spirit.
Thanks for the help my friend.
ZZZZZZZ |
|
12/24/04 |
|
Mary Dallas |
|
Oh, Matthew!
How good to hear your laugh on the audio clip Derek posted on your website. Amazing how the sound of your voice could send such a flood of memories. Of course, I think of you every time I fold a fitted sheet, but to hear your voice was something different altogether.
I miss you, Matthew!
Love, Mary Dallas |
|
1/21/04 |
|
Talie |
|
Hello Matthew,
it's been awhile since I've said howdy to you, I'm doing ok,
but my mom recently passed away and I miss her very much. If you see her could
you please let her know that all of her daughter's and her friends miss her a
great deal. Matthew please know that you are thought of and missed a great
deal also,I hope that where ever your travels lead you happiness follows you each
step of the way. Love Talie. |
|
5/24/02 |
|
Zeppa |
|
Hey Hombre-
Lit a candle today and played music in your memory. I played it for as
long as the candle burned, shed a few tears; let it flow and let it go.
Never had much use for a memorial day. Still don't really, as you are
always in my life, but it seemed like the thing to do at the time. Been a
rough year bra. Just needed to write you to say that "Every little thing,
gonna be all right." Bob said so.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ |
|
3/31/02 |
|
Talie |
|
Hello Mattie,
The last time we had spoken was right before xmas of 99, the time I had spent in Alaska was a time that I will never forget. I had a wonderful time meeting everyone,learning to live amongst people I had never met before,experiencing a beautiful place with wonderful people,you were one of them,your kindness, and laughter I will always remember not to forget how you were always making people laugh and smile, thank you for making my time at AWA so great. I will never forget Alaska or you. I would also like to thank your family for their correspondence with me, much love to you Matthew.
Always your friend Talie Olson |
|
2/5/02 |
|
Jen |
|
Dear Sunshine
I have been thinking of you all the time. I just spent the last thirty
days rafting down the Grand Canyon with some incredible folks from the
Humboldt area. I just have to thank you because I know you were my angel
in making all that magic happen. I hadn't met any of those people before
the trip. They had been planning it for years and I found out and jumped
in just a few days before we all headed to Flagstaff. The amazing woman
that I shared a boat with for the journey was in you swiftwater rescue
class right before you left us. She told me stories of you convincing
everyone to play Euchre at night, of your smile and your laugh and your
amazing kindness. I cried so hard, but out of happiness, because she is
the first person I have met who knew you in all of your amazingness.
I didn't have to try to describe you - she had been lucky enough to
experience it all firsthand.
Every time I am on a river I feel so connected to you. You were my first
draw to the water, cute river guide in carhartts saving my butt as I
accidentally floated the gear boat into a back channel—oops! The strength,
the serenity, the gentle laughter of the water, the soft breeze, the incomprehensible
scale of time and shortness of human life were so vivid in the Grand Canyon I
thought of you endlessly. This spring when I head back up to northern CA to
do some boating with my newfound friends I will think of you again and all
that you have taught me and inspired in me and I will bow to the life force
in those flowing waters and know that you are there.
I love you
Jen |
|
12/16/01 |
|
Ann |
|
Dear Mattie,
I had a dream shortly after you left us. I had just left camp and was
walking towards Turquoise when I saw Winston on the road. The truck pulled
into Max's driveway and turned around. I only saw Marko, who was driving,
and although I sensed you were there, I still couldn't see you. So I said hi
to Marko, and put my head in the car to look in at the passenger's seat. I
called out your name, "Matthew? Are you there?" At first I just saw an empty
seat, but slowly you faded into my sight. You were there, smiling and
leaning out towards me, and you looked me right in the eye and I could see
your face so incredibly clearly.
You started to smile, and you said, "Of course I am. I'm right here. What
don't you see?" Suddenly you were as clear as day, and we held our gaze
until you started to smile real big and you chuckled and laughed. Of course,
why hadn't I seen you? You were right there all along; I just had to look a
little harder. But you were definitely there. We held our gaze until I
understood that you were making fun of me for not having seen you before,
and we laughed and laughed some more, at which point I managed to wake
myself up still smiling.
When I start to miss you Mattie, I think of that dream. I think it was your
way of visiting me and letting me know you would be there for me or any of
us whenever we wanted to see you, seek your advice, or to call you to see a
sunset or some beautiful mountains.
As much as we all miss you, I feel blessed to have had you in my life. As
Zeppa said, I will see you when its my turn to go, but until then, we
continue to celebrate your spirit. And I still wear the awesome slippers you
gave me on cold winter mornings and my feet and heart are warmed by you.
Thank you and take good care of yourself, my friend.
Love,
Ann |
|
12/7/01 |
|
Zeppa |
|
Hondo G-Force-
I've been sending you E-mail. I'm sure it's reaching you,
as the pixels disperse into the cosmos. Well, since there's a place I can send
them where others' can share too, it seems more appropriate to do that.
So, "Mr. Bull of the Boathouse," I never told you how proud I am of
you. Running rivers is more than a job, it's a lifestyle, and you lived
it well. You also help me get my ass out of bed when life gets me down;
I have one of your shirts hanging in my room to remind me every second I
have in this strange little life is to be cherished. I feel like we can
do it together when I feel alone. We had this hand gesture saying, "You mess with the bull, and you'll get the horns." It was more of an inside
joke, since we were just teddy bears at heart, but attitude is
everything if you want to be effective. I feel like I'm living on
borrowed time sometimes but you remind me life isn't fair, it's a roll
of the bones. If it were fair we'd probably be slabbin' trees with that
Alaskan chainsaw mill today. Ah, the smell of large 2 stroke chainsaw,
burning bar oil and spittin' chips like nobody's business. Yes my
friend, only a few people love that experience and we shared that for
sure. I miss you my friend but the love for you and the things we share
helps to get me to tomorrow. See you when my number comes up dude.
Peace-
ZePPa |
|
11/7/01 |
|
Jeffy |
|
Dear Mattchoo,
I don't really know what to say in this venue, but I miss you, my friend.
You know, Jessica handed me a piece of metal from your ashes—an angular
C-shaped disc that fit nicely in the palm. I held it for about five minutes
as we led The Reverend and Mitchell back up to your home in Zenia. I'm not
a spiritual person, you know that. But it gave me five minutes of clarity
like time standing still, all sounds insulated. I won't forget that. After
handing it back to her, I smiled and tried to think of where all that metal
came from: Your belt buckle? Probably. Those pins in your ankle from your
mishap at the CLCC? Yep.
I don't know where the heck you are right now but I hope you keep weaving
your magic mojo over those of us still walking the earth.
Take Care and stay in touch, Tiger.
Love,
Jeff |
|
11/6/01 |
|
Mitchell |
|
Dear Matt,
Every summer I take a solo kayaking trip somewhere in the wilds of Alaska, I wear your life vest and I feel your spirit within me. I will never forget that special time we spent together plying the waters of Prince William Sound and all the crazy adventures we had. Happy Birthday Matt, your spirit will live in us forever.
Love,
Mitchell |
|
10/31/01 |
|
Emily |
|
yo matty pooh!
thinking of that night
when we were doing our "river talk"
at the fire
still makes me laugh to the point of tears
"who can tell me what makes the river that color?...
no, you wrong
no, you wrong...
its da' silt"
i miss you so much matty pooh
every time i laugh, you are with me
every time i think of our crazy times together...
i laugh
thank you.
all my love and stomach hugs!!!!
bubbles |
|
10/30/01 |
|
Brooke |
|
Matty-PooH!
I took your x-country skis out for your birthday. They enjoyed the snowy peaks and light playing off the water of Turnagain arm. They are happy here and you will be psyched to know that the telemark skills you taught me that crazy fun weekend with our good buddy D-love (who's marrying his special sauce, KK, by the way!) at Crater Lake, will be put to use this year high in the Chugach Mountains as I make turns at my new job for Valdez Heli Ski Guides. Wow, goood thing you didn't teach me no english, since that was the biggest run on sentence i ever done made, i doubt you wouldda been proud of that, but then you were proud of everything i done. I love you and think of you quite often. your eyes smile at me from beside my woodstove in my cabin. do something nice for someone to day... then tick that box! i will too.
all my love, cookie |
|
10/30/01 |
|
Kyle |
|
Matthew,
Happy Birthday you big, sexy man! I thought of you last Saturday when
Jeff, Tommy and I were floating the Kenai in the hopes of catching some
late season silvers. The weather was very cold but the sky was clear and
we were the only people on the river. Oh yes, we did catch some beautiful
Kenai Silvers which made the day extra special.
I know the Kenai will always be your home and I feel lucky to share that
home with you!
Cheers to you, Matthew, on your birthday and your strong spirit that lives
in all of us!
Love,
Kyle |
|
10/29/01 |
|
Derek |
|
Dear Matty,
Happy Birthday. Tonight Beth and I cooked up a bit of "chicken matty", and talked about the old days. It's hard to believe that we have to go such a long time before we see you again. We will never forget that night on the road in the fall of '98... you and Boom and Phu heading west, us heading east, the CB radio gradually fading out into static as we lost you...I miss you brother.
Love,
Derek |
|
|
